To them, their core audience consists entirely of blue-collar shoppers who are too stupid to shop anywhere but Wal-Mart and who’ve yet to grasp the concept of downloading. It also speaks volumes on how the Eagles view their own fans. Speaking of Wal-Mart: the hypocritical notion of preaching about “Business As Usual” while offering their product exclusively at perhaps the most unethical retail in the country demonstrates the complete lack of moral code that the band possesses. It’s safe to say that the tie-in with Wal-Mart addresses exactly that and helps ensure that the band gets paid even when the industry is in peril. Guaranteed: if it appeared that not enough profit would have been generated from a new studio album, we wouldn’t even be talking about a new Eagles album. Eden sounds like it was conceived with the help of accountants who ran profit illustrations long before rehearsals were even scheduled. There’s no unfinished business to address or any creative urge to explore. There’s not a shred of evidence that these guys genuinely felt the need to work together again. The very notion that this album even exists angers me. There’s nothing in the Eagles double-set to alienate a single soul out of those twenty-eight million customers that bought Greatest Hits. Yes, the harmonies are enviable, the production is immaculate, and the performances are what you’d expect from a band that holds the record for most albums ever sold. The first thing you’ll hear from critics and fans is how much Eden sounds like the “old” Eagles. It’s not as if anything I say is going to make jack shit of a difference to the band’s core audience, an audience that’s likely to include my own Father. So maybe I’m not the best choice to review the new Eagles album and maybe the idea itself is a bit presumptuous. I left the gift in its shrink rap and traded in on something more aligned with my own musical taste. Perhaps this is the record that people turn to whenever they’re faced with addressing someone who is a bit of a music fan because, fuck, so many people bought Greatest Hits that it must mean that everyone who likes music loves that album. I mean, I was sure that I had let on about a few bands that I like and I am absolutely positive that the Eagles never once entered into the conversation. Privately, I thought it was a little shortsighted. I was gracious I thanked him for the gift and referred to the record’s huge appeal. The album that he bought me was the Eagles Their Greatest Hits 1971-1975. True story: I once received a Christmas present from a co-worker who knew I was a music fan. Eagles – Long Road Out Of Eden ( Eagles Recording Company)

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